Overwhelmed

Sometimes, the brain and the body do not communicate properly. The brain says "Do more! Do more!" but the body is tired. The brain and body fight, and the soul loses.

When this happens, you feel chained. Chained to your expectations and to the expectations of others. Chained to what you want to do and what you have to do. Chained. Stuck. What do you do? Nothing.

Or, rather than continuing to push, you make a change. You break the chains.

Right now, I feel stuck. I have goals. Everything I do works only to further my reach towards those goals. But, I still feel stuck. Life seems to be moving in a rushing whirl of quick decisions and bad mistakes. Everything is a rush.

I miss feeling quiet. I crave the silence of an early morning, drinking coffee with my love, staring at the sunrise. I yearn again to feel the sense of calm after finishing an essay. Now, when I finish work, another pile falls into my lap.

I want to adapt. I need to adapt. Change happens. There will be moments of stillness. Moments of peace. I will know again the feeling of warmth and contentment. Adaption. Learning. Knowledge. These are what I need.

Life is a rushing river, a buckin' bronco. Sometimes, the river bends. Sometimes, the bronco yields. And sometimes, the boat capsizes and the brono bucks too hard. Climb back up. Rebuild the boat. Ride, and hold on. Through it all, there is light. Eventually the bronco will tire, the river will calm. Then, make a move. Do what must be done to maintain sanity. Until then, hold tight.